Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts

Friday, September 6, 2013

In sickness and in health, till death do us part

There are nights I lie awake watching you sleep and I think to myself that my life is nothing without you. And with that thought, a deep sense of grief overwhelms me and I sob silently as you sleep. If there is one thing I have learnt these ten years together, it is not to take a single day for granted. All the joy and sorrow we have experienced have led me to understand that the only certainty in life is uncertainty.

So we celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary this 6 September, I ask myself what our ten years mean to me.  

Ten years is
... living with your chronic, progressive, painful inflammatory rheumatic disease and learning to cope with the sneaky attacks that give you excruciating pain and cripple your everyday life.

Ten years is
... having your parents live with us because I know your sense of responsibility is so strong that you cannot bear to have them live on their own.

Ten years is
... supporting you through your days as a postgraduate student and being so happy when you were conferred the doctoral title that people thought I was the one with the PhD!

Ten years is
... laughing at my stupid jokes every.single.time.

Ten years is
... being angry with people who belittle me and swearing to get even! 

Ten years is
... having complete faith in me and trusting my intuition about people.

Ten years is
... shopping with me at kate spade so often that all the sales people know you and greet you with a big smile!

Ten years is
... waking earlier than me on Sundays to cook so that I can have a delicious meal the minute I wake.


Ten years is
... queuing with me into the wee hours just because I had promised to get a Hello Kitty doll for a good friend.


Ten years is
... taking leave to accompany me on my PhD residentials twice a year and doing all the cooking and washing because you want me to focus on my studies.

Ten years is
...deciding to document my life in England even though photography is not your interest so that you can share the photos with my parents and they can have a glimpse of my life as a PhD student.


Ten years is
... making the effort to spend time with my parents and arrange dinner dates with my siblings.

Ten years is
... pretending not to see how fat I have grown and telling me ever so often that I'm smart and beautiful.

Ten years is
... crying with me when I shared about our infertility with church friends.

Ten years is
... supporting my decision not to attend church on Mother’s Day and Father’s Day because when our pastor asked all the mothers and fathers to stand, he makes me feel that we have the parts but not the goods and that cuts like a knife.

Ten years is
... going through the fertility treatment with me, learning to use needles and syringes and looking very sorry every time you give me an injection.

Ten years is
... agreeing to let me adopt a dog because you understand that our childlessness has left a big void in my heart.

Ten years is
... travelling for over an hour by bus and train from your work place to mine because you know that my work is a drag and seeing you after work is the highlight of my day.

Ten years is
... talking about our day face-to-face or via Skype every day for the last ten years because without that we cannot fall asleep.

Ten years is
... all the prayers, love and anger, hugs and kisses, laughter and tears, holding hands and heated quarrels, and more than words can say.

Ten years is you and me wrapped in happiness, joy and sorrow.
They are the best years of my life and I pray we have many, many more such blessed years together.

Happy anniversary, my dearest J! :) Every day, I thank God for you.

p.s. I love you to the moon and back.


Wednesday, July 11, 2012

J meets the AS doctor!

The Ankylosing Spondylitis (AS) patients in J's support group met up for an annual dinner thingy and this year, the hospital invited Dr Asim Khan. J was to introduce him before he gave his talk and after the whole event, he grabbed the opportunity to get the man's autograph!



When J was diagnosed with AS in 2005, we were desperate for answers. We found them in the book that Dr Asim wrote. It was the only copy in Kinokuniya, which probably explains why none of J's friends in the support group has read it. AS is a chronic, progressive, painful inflammatory rheumatic disease. However, because J does not complain even when he is in immense pain and he tries not to let the illness cripple his life, many of our friends and even our families don't know or think much of this disease. We are grateful that the attacks come on and off and he is not in excruciating pain 24/7. Plus, there are now drugs that can combat the pain to a great extent. The down side to the drugs? Possible heart failure. :(

Nevertheless, we are thankful for each day and certainly we draw inspiration from Dr Asim, the doctor who has the disease himself and devotes his life to finding ways to help others with the AS.

Read about Dr. Asim Khan's story here.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Sheffield May 2012

A very unnerving flight - filled with worries and turbulence that lasted over an hour

 Celebratory champagne for Dr J!

Even Sheffield has one.

This was taken at 8:40 p.m. on a night in May.
Long but cold summer days in Sheffield

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Mother's Day

 


When it comes to expressing love and gratitude for mom, where does one even start?

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Waiting for love

On a wet and tiring Tuesday, J waits for me in the drizzle right across my office.


This is how I 'survive my time in the cell' - looking forward to the end of the day when I get to see J after work. Unlike most people who suffer from Monday blues, I find Tuesdays the hardest and J knows this.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Technically it's not my birthday


This is the birthday cake that got cut up before the birthday song was sung and the birthday girl got to make a wish. No, seriously, I kid you not.

And the conversation that took place?

You cut the cake??
Ya.
But you haven't sung me the song and I didn't get to make a wish!
Oh... (Pregnant pause) But it's not your birthday yet. Your birthday is tomorrow.
So am I getting a cake tomorrow?
Nope. This is it.

?!?!

Happy 36th birthday to me in advance. I wish myself good health and lots of joy in the coming year!

Friday, March 9, 2012

Roast meat

This is apparently everyone's favourite roast meat stall. By that, I mean J, his buddies and my siblings.



It's somewhere in Serangoon but I don't know the address.



Apparently glazing with honey before roasting makes all the difference. I think my pictures do it injustice.

Monday, February 20, 2012

Breakfast without you

sucks.



In so many ways, on so many levels, I miss you.
I miss going to work with you.
I miss our meals together at the university.
I miss being at work knowing your office is just a block away from mine.
I miss picking up the phone, dialing your extension, and hearing your voice.
I miss going home from work at unearthly hours together with you.
I miss bumping into you in the library, at the cafe, in the canteen by chance and the surge of happiness that follows.

I miss you.

Monday, January 30, 2012

The story of a man and three women

These are J's favourite food for CNY. Every year without fail, he buys and eats tons of these. Me? I like neither.


Muay Chee - a sort of sweet glutinous rice based treat.


Ba Kwa (肉干) - roasted dried meat. The Asian version of beef jerky? Just sweeter and juicier. Mind you, not any brand will do, only the one shown in the photo above.

Every year, I'll tell him to eat in moderation. He ignores me every single time.

Enters his mother-in-law who only has to say it to him once how we are what we eat and obediently he will stay away from these food for a good few days. This pattern repeats every year without fail.

My mother-in-law? She joins him in the merry eating! Hahaha!

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Merry Christmas!

Christmas shopping was done in HK this year.





Blessed Christmas to one and all!

Love and peace be with you. :)

Monday, December 12, 2011

Hands



Our last morning going to work together. Will miss you so much come 2012.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

年年有今日!

爸爸,祝您生日快乐,身体健康!



Happy 81st!

Monday, December 5, 2011

Morning madness

Mom had surgery recently and I stayed over to look after her. On the morning I was to take her back to the hospital for her medical review, I grabbed what was to me a bottle of sugar and dumped a teaspoon of it into my coffee.



Big mistake. Turns out it was salt.

The question you might ask, did I drink it?

And the answer is Yes.

Salty or sweet, I need my morning coffee and there was no time to make another cup!

Friday, November 18, 2011

Another precious morning


Officially I have till the end of the year before I move on to my new job. In truth, it's just another 7 more working days because I will be clearing my annual leave.

I will miss the time I spend with J over breakfast every morning on campus most.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

060911

Happy anniversary J!



The flowers are wicked!



Thank you for 8 indubitably fantastic years! Everyday I thank God for you.



May we always put God in the center of our marriage.



I love you to the moon and back!

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Lychee fever


July spells only one thing to me - LYCHEES!

My father told me that for seasonal fruits like lychees, the beginning and end of the harvest yield poor fruits, and July is usually the best time to buy these fruits. Well, my dad is 80 and it's hard not to believe a man whose years of life experience and wisdom far exceed mine!

The lychees seen in the picture above amount to slightly less than one kg. I had to gobble 4 or 5 before I took this photo. Yes I am greedy this way! Anyway, a kg of these cost me $6. These lychees from China are hideously green but unbelievably sweet! If you have any intention of buying some, don't waste your money on the red ones from Thailand. I swear they are more sour than lemons.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

81st

Ah Ma celebrated her birthday recently. The buffet lunch at Ellenborough Market Cafe saw 34 people turn up. All are family!

J and I were horrid. We were the first to reach the hotel but the only ones who forgot to bring her a gift! So the very next day, we went to buy her this.



J tells me that Ah Ma does not wear any gold. She does not have any. Many many years ago, Ah Gong's business went bust and she pawned her precious jewellery (I heard her dowry included) to make ends meet.



This is a very tiny bracelet we got her, nothing compared to the glitter she used to possess. Nevertheless we hope it will bring her a little joy and some good memories.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Mockery



"Tsk tsk tsk, even your earrings come with a dust bag."

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

If ever


we take pictures to mark our 10th wedding anniversary, I told J I'd like a picture of us like that. :)

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

2 days, 13 capsules

That is how much coffee we drank. Mostly J actually.


While I was doing some last minute work (as usual) trying to make sense of my conference presentation slides, J was writing a chapter for his PhD thesis. I have long decided that it isn't just brains that you need to do a PhD, it's perseverance with a capital P. And in the last month alone, he read over 70 articles just to put together this 1 chapter. I.do.not.envy.